My Husband is Leaving Me
Yes, you read that correctly. My husband is leaving me. We couldn't make a it. I'm almost 6 months pregnant. And Clarke doesn't turn 2 until November.
...I don't know how we're going to make it through this....
Now before you bring out the torches and pitch forks, we all know that Jake's in the military. He's not divorcing me. He's deploying...which doesn't make any of this easier... Actually, it kinda makes things harder.
We've been through deployments before. The first one, I had my brother and one of my friends fly in from Germany to help me through it. He pretty much did anything to take my mind off the waiting. This time, it's different.
I can't explain to my son where his daddy is and why he can't be the one to tuck him in at night. I can't explain to our unborn baby that I can't have salted caramel ice cream because I have no one to drive to the store at two in the morning. I can't explain to people why Jake loves being a servant because they just won't understand.
I won't know where he is going. I won't know when he will be home. All I know is that he's going to love me through it. Every hormonal melt down. Every email that is full of complaints over how I didn't like my cashier at the grocery store. Every time I have to endure something I wish he was present for. He is going to love me and we're going to love him.
This isn't a life that I would wish onto anyone. However, I wouldn't change a single thing. I am endlessly and fearlessly in love with my best friend and I would go to the ends of the world for him. State side or sea side, I will always be by his side. I just wish the rest of the world would love me through the hard times.
For all the well wishers, please understand. If you ever come across a military family with a deployed spouse, do not fault them for how they are handling it. Just love them through it. Most of us have a strict schedule and our own method of keeping our sanity. We’ve done this before and we’ve figured out what works.
You have to remember, we do the deployments. We do the separation. We fight the battle on the home front. Not you. We are thrown to different parts of the world without a support system. We find refuge in people who are fighting the same fight as us. Don’t fault us for learning how to survive.
In a short time, my husband will be home. My family will be whole and our newest addition will be making their arrival. Hopefully, after Dad makes it back! When you think of us and our story, just pray. We'll be surviving just fine.